Personal Trainer OMG

13th sI was at the biggest douche bar in NYC, The 13th Step, with Dani 1 night when she spotted him. He had brown hair, cauliflower ears and defined muscles protruding through his tight tee. I thought he looked sort of “Jersey shore,” but Dani was from the Jersey Shore so I couldn’t blame her.

We started talking to the guy. He was a personal trainer and also worked at the farmers market selling his family’s farmed goods. His family owned a farm in New Jersey so he sometimes helped out with farm work as well. I was pretty interested in farming at the time so I had plenty of questions.

Dani ran into her “Monday guy” and I tried to distract myself from the farmer/ personal trainer by talking to this seemingly gay guy to the right of me.

brown out

I’m mildly freaking out because the gay guy tried to make out with me! And I went along with it for a second because I didn’t see it coming! Bleh!

I looked over at Dani who was flirting with her Monday boy despite the fact that he was with what I could only assume was his Sunday girl given that it was Sunday.

brown out

Dani and I are talking to the personal trainer and his less exciting friend. Dani gets up to go to the bathroom and the personal trainer asks me to go home with him. I explain to him that Dani is into him and so it wouldn’t be respectful of me. He says that he’s not into Dani.

brown out

“Oh my god! Wow! You’re so good!” I scream. The personal trainer is hanging onto the pipes above his bed to lift himself in order to thrust harder. Which was a technique that clearly worked!

We had sex for a long time but it was too crazy good for me to come and he still hadn’t. “That’s so fun that you have pipes above your bed!” I said.

“You want to try?” He asked.
I got on top. I was really into the pipes. We had sex in a bunch of positions and came a couple times. After, I proceeded to play on the pipes like a child. I was all hyped up from the amazing sex.

When I saw Dani at school, she wasn’t too thrilled with me for “taking her guy.” I told her that I felt really bad but couldn’t help but to tell her how awesome the sex was. I think that it was the best sex of my life and I knew Dani would appreciate that. Dani gave me a hard time for weeks and I never “took her guy,” again.

I also never saw the personal trainer again. He was one of the only guys that I ever tried booty calling. He didn’t seem to into it (given he said he was in New Orleans so he was probably living it up) so I didn’t bother again.

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