When A Tinder Date Goes Too Well

Tommy, my boyfriend who I’m in an open relationship with, typically visits me every week and stays for about 3 nights. But this week he was going to some concerts that I wasn’t so interested in so wasn’t not coming. I took this as an opportunity to find myself a tinder date. I hadn’t fucked a single guy other than Tommy for 2 months and the monogamy was getting to me.

There are a couple of reasons for that monogamy:
1. Two months ago, I moved to a small, male dominated town. The majority of my friend prospects are guys. I don’t want to ruin friendships by whoring around with all of my new guy friends. I’ve learned this either complicates things in the sense that the guys want to date you or stop thinking of you as a friend, but rather a slut
2. The guys here are desperate which is a huge turn off
3. Tommy visits me for 3 nights every week and so I have limited nights to bring guys back. If I start tindering, I usually have to chat with them, organize a meet up, and go home with them in the same night. And, after partying with Tommy, I need the energy to do so. I could go to a bar and meet a random guy but the likelihood of me finding an attractive tourist with a decent enough personality to talk to for the night is slim. And I won’t hook up with locals because I’d prefer to make friends as mentioned.

But anyway, this week I did have time and I selected an Aussie named David who was on vacation here. I met up with him at a bar. He came with a cousin and I came with my roommate. He was attractive and extremely sweet. We played in the snow and made out a bit.

We went to the next bar where I lent someone my bear coat (the workaholics one- it is my favorite party toy and I love lending it to people because it makes them happy.)

bearpicThe girl that I lent it to took off with it! The bear coat is my most prized possession and 1 of the only material objects that I care about- the other being my turkey beanie. I even have an Instagram account for my bear. And I couldn’t help but to cry- even in front of Dave. Dave gave me a hug but I recently hurt my ribs snowboarding so it only made me cry more. Dave felt really bad.

We got on a bus and parted ways. We were supposed to ride together in the morning. Dave was new to snowboarding and I’m terrible so we thought that it would be a good fit.

The next day, Dave asked me if I still wanted to ride in spite of my bear coat. I did. We were a pretty good riding match in terms of our ability and we got on well. After riding, we got a couple of drinks at a local bar and Dave went back to his place. I invited him to a band later that night but he was too tired to come.

The band was great! My friend from work was a huge fan of theirs and invited me. A guy there invited me to smoke weed with the band. I excitedly invited John to join knowing that he would love to meet the band. I never smoke weed and I ended up getting fucked up.

I woke up on a random couch the next morning, hitchhiked to the bus stop, finally arrived home, and didn’t move from my bed for the rest of the day. That is not like me at all! I think that I maintained a residual high. David invited me out that night but it wasn’t going to happen.

Meanwhile I got a message from a girl saying that she had my bear coat. She’d seen my roommates post on Facebook. She said that she’d drop it off but then she forgot. She said that I could pick it up but I couldn’t move. She seemed flaky anyway. I was struggling to understand when she’d be home and where her place was.

The next morning I received a message from a coworker, Nick, saying that he had my bear coat! And then another from my roommate saying that he had it! The girl had worn it to a party the night prior and Nick saw it and got it back for me! And then Nick ran into my roommate and gave it to him!

I met up with David for some drinks after work. My coworker, Captain joined. Captain talked about 3rd wave coffee and we all had a laugh.3rd wave coffee He’s such a hipster. He has a handlebar mustache & glasses. Captain used to live in Australia so he and Dave had lots to talk about.

There was a fireworks show later that night and we all wanted to go. Captain wanted to change but Dave and I headed to town and got a bite to eat. We went to a great burger place/ bar. Then we went and watched the fireworks. They were huge!


After, we went to a bar where the bartender was a rugby player. Dave doesn’t play rugby but the bartender, Micah, was a big fan of his because Dave is an Aussie. Dave told me how he and his friends always ordered terrible drinks for each other as a joke. I liked the idea so we played. Dave ordered me Franjelico which tasted like maple syrup. I wanted pancakes for it but the bar didn’t have any so I had to surrender. Micah was happy that Dave won.

Then we moved on to another bar where I proceeded to tell Dave that I sort of had a boyfriend. Dave was not happy about it. So I tried to sort of take back my words but also explain that I just wanted to be honest with him.

After that, we got on the bus and Dave and I debated on whose place we should go to. He was staying with his siblings and cousins so he wanted to go to my place but I explained to him how messy my place was. He won. I wanted to shower so I invited him in. We were about to have sex when I asked him if he had a condom. He didn’t. So we went to bed.

The next day was the Super Bowl. I got out of work, ran home to shower, and went to my friend Mikey’s place. I sort of invited Dave but since he was downtown I told him that I’d meet him there after the game. When I met him, he was with his 3 cousins, his brother, and his sister. His cousin was trying to embarrass him by making him sound creepy and so Dave wanted to leave them. His sister was really nice though.

We went to another bar where every guy seemed to try and hit on me despite Dave standing right there.

I asked him if he wanted to come back to my place because I was really tired. I decided to work up the courage to ask my roommate for a condom. Both roommates offered when I told them about the night before. It worked. We only had 1 but we both came. I came much more easily than with Tommy because I was more turned on by the excitement of us having sex. This made me feel a bit guilty.

The next day, today, we went snowboarding together. And he’s coming over now. And I bought a box of condoms so that we could have sex even though I feel sick.

This was supposed to be a random Aussie hookup, not a week of dating. But that seems to be what it turned into. And I can’t help but question my relationship with Tommy as a result.


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